Find Your Happy 

If you’ve been around for any length of time you probably understand that life happens and when it does you can lose your happiness among many other things. Lately I have been trying to find the abundance of happiness and joy that used to flow through me like blood. I’m sorry I haven’t been writing that much, but at the sane time I am not because I am trying to get back to my happy.

It was not until after I was done my book that I had realized that I lost the what was once contagious joy and happiness that radiated from me even through times of pain and sorrow. If you have been following my blog for a while you probably noticed that once the book was done my posting frequency dissipated.

A big part of writing my book was acknowledging all the things I had avoided dealing with during that time frame as my recovery was enough at the time I did not have the time or the energy to tackle anything else other than day-to-day life. Now into the better half of my recovery there has been a lot of reflection and time to accept, feel, and work through all those other things. Most days it’s at least a few hours of occupational/ physio exercises but after that I could spend a couple of hours staring at a wall while I do hand strengthening exercises. Over the last few months there has been a lot of healing so all that wall staring must be a good thing haha. I do not know that I’m ready to dive into my next book and set a deadline for it, but I am slowly getting back into writing.

No matter what life throws at you as you trek through your various journeys remember that you are not alone and that if need be you can modify the path to your goals to better suit your needs. It Is not how fast you make the journey, but the fact that you did it. Who cares if you reach your goal in two years or five years, the chances of you getting a prize for reaching the goal in a shorter period of time are slim unless you’re an Olympian.


Staycation Realities

Yesterday evening after spending a day planning out some S.MA.R.T. goals for the next couple years that I have totally turned into one of those adults that can’t take a vacation. So far I’m continuing to just try to write which is failing because I have too much on my mind. On the up side It has been raining a bit here and it seems to have washed away most of the sand and gravel off the roads so I’m hoping to start running again tomorrow. As soon as spring hits I start sleeping less as my brain realizes that the anniversaries of quite a few deaths are coming up. I’m glad that all of this hits only a couple of weeks before I can run because physical activity is the only good distraction and release.

Despite all the reminders and the lack of sleep I am still having more good days than bad, which came as a surprise. It is a little inconvenient to only be able to concentrate on the most random unnecessary things though. While basically on vacation is not the most ideal thing to be doing, really brain I feel like there are allowed to be weeks where I don’t need to be planning my life out. It’s a downfall of being one of those people who rarely does anything spontaneous, Unless I’m with my closest friends.