Successful VS. Fulfilling

As you probably already know everyone is looking for something in life. Some are looking for love, fame or success, But I am just looking for fulfillment. if you’re looking for success you are going to constantly the opinions of others and their judgements toward you, whereas a fulfilling life comes from within by meeting your own standards and expectations. I’m sorry, but none of my goals in life need to be approved or applauded by anyone other than myself. If you are happy and not causing anyone any harm why would anyone else’s opinion matter.

With social media it seems that we have come to a point where most people are posting play by plays of their life silently begging for their friends’ approval. Some of you may even remember a time in our lives before social media where nobody knew when you were doing anything unless you had called someone and made plans with them. Nobody knew when you were getting ice cream or going to the gym and back then it did not affect their day.

I know it might take a miracle, but I would love to see a higher percentage of people in the world in search of fulfillment instead of success.  People seem to have forgotten that you yourself are the only person that will truly understand your great accomplishments. Nobody has experienced the same things as you so it is virtually impossible for them to understand why your goals are what they are. With that alone you should stop letting other people determine how well you live your life and start judging your accomplishments yourself.

Get out there, fulfill your soul’s needs and be happy.


In Times of Change 

In times of change we each react in our own way. Some of us hate change while others embrace it, at the end of the day you have to do what works best for you. Growing up I was never that fond of change, but as the years have passed and I’ve overcome certain obstacles I’ve become a bit more spontaneous.

The old me used to need everything planned down to the minute and things needed to always go to plan. Compared to now where an hours notice is just generally appreciated. There’s no more weekly plan or schedule, at least while I’m taking classes. Now I mostly just listen to my body in trying to improve my physical recovery and take it one moment at a time. Sometimes this means having a great week of physio and occupational and taking the weekend to burn out and sleep for almost an entire day. The focus lately has been trying to find ways to better incorporate using my recovering hand into everyday life. One would think that I’d be a pro at this by now, but believe me every day comes with its own set of struggles.

I’m glad that I am no longer afraid of change as I became more open to opportunities that can come along. Despite being more open to change I have become a little more distant while I process and adjust to changes in life. This usually concerns people, but I have always done my best pondering alone. While working things out with myself depending on the size of the changes I can withdraw from my normal social activities for months at a time. I try not to distance myself from friends during these times, but at these times I usually end up falling off the fave of the earth for a couple or a few months that get back into things full swing like nothing ever happened.

From time to time I even have moments where I’m “ride or die” about any big decision that I may face. While these times come with good adventure and stories to tell this was a major change from me even just four years ago. When not being spontaneous I do a quick pro and con list in my head to see if said thing will move me closer to my goals or further away and go from there.

How do you handle or deal with change?

A Day In The Void

The following piece was inspired by a poetry reading at a local bookstore and coffee shop. I don’t think anything has come as close to describing my being since she’s been gone.

What you see standing before you isn’t me

For years I pretended, oh I tried

Behold is the shell of what I used to be

I gave into the darkness the day that she died

Almost like the ghost of what has gone in greed

I miss you old friend you are the soul that I still need

One Step At A Time

No matter the task at hand if it ever feels like a daunting weight on your shoulders just remember to take things one step at a time. Honestly you could be struggling with anything from mental health to figuring what you need to do to land that job that you have always dreamed of or even a combination of multiple things. It doesn’t make a difference what stage you are at in life there will always be something going on that you need to push through and get to the other side.

On a daily basis I have to remind myself one step at a time because I have to focus the next few or several years on retraining my hand to work like it used to so that I can pursue my next goal. To me spending my days doing retraining of my hand and re-wiring some crossed pathways is usually frustrating and at the end if the day does not seem like I’m taking steps forward but every once in a while I notice a difference that makes it worth it. I have to remind myself all the time that one day these countless hours will be worth it and I will be chasing the next dream.

Whenever you get overwhelmed by that bigger picture. Take a step back for a minute and think about the next one or two smaller steps you need to complete to get closer to the end goal. Focusing on your smaller yet just as equal successes along the way is important. Without taking the smaller steps along the way you wont reach the bigger goal i promise. Celebrate the little wins even if that’s just doing something for yourself or some well deserved self-care. In this world everyone is watching for your mistakes not your successes and that’s why you have to celebrate them yourself.

check out the other iarts of this collaberation at:

Tajwar Fatma

Jane Love

Jothish Joseph

Barb Caffrey

Nicolle K

Ajibola Sunday

Sonyo Estavillo

Mylene Orillo

Camilla Motte

Manal Ahmad

Ipuna Black

Sadaf Siddiqi

Divyang Shah