Guest Post: Growing Through Poison

Guest Post From Hannah

Hopes and dreams are perfectly fine, as long as you never achieve them.

The clouds are for rain, not your head. Get it out of the clouds.

Grow up. Get real. Think straight.

People get in your head, like a thick disease, looking to slowly kill you, from the inside out. Your ideas are only meant for their judgement. The more you dream, the less chance you have at survival.

Follow what people tell you. If they tell you something is more “normal”, do it: “normal” is good in their eyes. Listen to them. Be normal. Don’t be unique and different; there’s no such thing as individuality.

Machine-made humans, all following one another. Individuality is confusing and complex; keep it simple, and nobody will ever get on your case.

I’m human.

I have hopes, and dreams, and ideas that I really want to pursue one day.

I don’t want to be some robot, that follows society with everything they sand I do; I’m unique and different on my own, and I like it like that.

Society doesn’t control me. And people who judge me don’t control me, either. Sure, I’ll get judged and hated and scrutinized, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is me, following my heart.

It never used to be that way, though….

I love stories. I love emotions, and feelings, and heart. I want to create something that gets people to {feel} something, whether that’s through art, writing, film – I want people to {feel}.

I’d always been told I’d never get out. I’d never make it, I’d never be able to do what I want to do. Ever.

After a while, I started to believe it. People’s hatred towards me for my ideas, it seeped into my bloodstream. It broke my heart to bits. It made me sick, mentally and physically. It made me make a lot of decisions that I absolutely regret today. I was dying, because of what these people poisoned me with.

I wished for it all to just stop, to go away. It never did. In the world we live in, it’ll never go away.

Until I couldn’t take it…. I remember it was raining. I lived with toxic people, in some apartment that made me terrified. They were gone, but their words still rang in my ears. My dying heart had had enough…. I packed my shit and left.

I’ve cut toxic people from my life. A LOT of toxic people. Ex friends, family members, people I used to trust with my life. And I started rebuilding myself, one breath at a time.

Now? I’ve got a strong heart, open mind, and a goal in sight. I’m not where I want to be yet, but I’m well on my way. I’m strong enough to be myself and get there. It’ll take some heart and soul and pure willpower, but I will get there.

And if you have hopes and dreams and ideas, by all means, pursue them. We are all unique, and magical, and creative. Pursue and obtain your goals, even if it takes some time to do it.

We can do it.

Candidly,

Hannah

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