Time: There’s Never Enough

If you’ve been an adult for a while, or a post secondary student you know exactly what I’m talking about. You know that when there’s a deadline something has to give. I’m one of those people that usually forfeits sleep first. The last time I remember getting the doctor recommended amount of sleep would be my early teen years before I had a job so it’s been a solid five years for me. Whether it’s school, work, or life we have all been in a situation where we wished there was more time in a day. I wish there were four to six more hours in a day personally.

I definitely slept the least In college with a full time course load and working about 30 hours a week at the same time. with my first class starting at 8 am and once classes were done Id work until 9 at night then after getting home do at least a few hours of homework. I was getting an average of three hours of sleep a night. After getting a concussion during that semester I was supposed to get ten 8-10 hours just for my brain to recover. This never happened it took five months to recover just because there wasn’t enough time. The first three months of that concussion I had a migraine that made everything more difficult.

Living in a culture were it’s go go go all the time can definitely put a strain on things. There’s an expectation that we aren’t even supposed to reach burn out, but that’s very unrealistic. When I’m in productive writing mode I say up into the early hours of the next day and get up early every day just to make sure I’m getting everything done. When I do this I burn out every four to six months. If we learned how to approach things at a slower pace I’m Pretty sure we’d stop running out of time.

Why The Facade

via Daily Prompt: Facade

Throughout difficult times most of the people I know where a mask. I know I do it because I find It easier to let people think everything is hunky dory than explain why I’m struggling. Most of the times I have a facade are due to the grieving process. Other people I know have there facade to hide hide things Like: mental illness, Issues on the home front, and also grief. Of course there are other reasons people have facades, but these are the ones I see most often.

Most People can’t tell when I’m wearing that mask. Even though I’m struggling with something I continue to smile and laugh like I always do. I do have one big tell though. I go from outspoken to not talking unless asked a question. There are also times where enough is going on that I can’t maintain my facade. An example of that is around the anniversaries of people I’ve lost. I’m usually an emotional wreck on the anniversary of my childhood friends death. I usually Try to take the day off so I can deal with it. This year I didn’t have the opportunity to take it off, It was the most difficult work day I’ve ever had. There were so many times helping customers that I literally couldn’t speak because I was holding back so many emotions and tears.

Just because someone looks fine on the outside doesn’t actually mean that everything is okay.  It’s way easier to wear a mask then to open up in a society where empathy is a lost trait. If you’ve ever had a job you didn’t like you probably wore a facade to pretend that you didn’t hate your job so much.

What are some other reasons that you’ve had to have a facade?

Roommates: The Ones You Fight With

via Daily Prompt: Disagree

If you’ve ever had roommates you probably know exactly what I’m talking about, I’ve only had three non family roommates and two of them fit into the “roommate from hell” category. At the beginning it starts with little disagreements, then suddenly you’re cleaning up after them every day and try your best to not be home when you know they will be. Given my experiences renting a room on the upper floor of a house, I’ll never do it again. One of those crappy roommates was my landlord from hell.

The other renter in the house thankfully did her own dishes, but would go on three day benders leaving me to take care of her Great Dane without even asking. How could I not take care of the dog, I wasn’t going to let him suffer just because his owner was insanely irresponsible. she’s lucky I didn’t just phone the pound over how he was neglected. If she was home she would have friends over and play music loud enough to wake me up until 3am in the middle of the week. Given I had 8 am classes almost every day taking a full course load and working almost full time, this was a major pain. On occasion she would also eat the food I made without even asking which was more frustrating living off a student budget.

Between the landlord and the roommate I definitely preferred the dog, at least he appreciated what I did for him. The guy that owned the house had the whole lower level to himself and still used the shared space 24/7 so nobody else had access to it. Given that that 41 year old man didn’t was more than a single spoon the whole time I lived there, I just assumed his parents never taught him how to clean up after himself. some people’s kids I tell ya.

Thankfully the crappy renter eventually moved out and the roommate that replaced her was phenomenal. Within a few weeks we were running together, hanging out, and became best friends. She did this amazing thing called cleaning up after herself, It was amazing. Our friendship caused a lot of tension between the landlord and us. We offered for him to join us on our adventures, but he had no interest in going jogging or anything related to living a healthier life. Out of the three of them given the opportunity I would only even think about living with one of them again.

Why The Need to Pretend

via Daily Prompt: Pretend

Why is it that In a country where people have more rights and freedoms than most countries people still feel the need to pretend to be something they’re not? Why is it more important to be popular rather than authentic? As you guys already know I have a big problem with this. As humans we are emotional beings, why are guys expected to not show them. Over the last almost two decades I’ve had to learn to keep a great front up at all times, This shouldn’t be necessary. Nobody no matter gender shouldn’t be judged for having emotions.

Having this front as too how we are supposed to feel and act as men has definitely affected how I’m Perceived most of the time. Most people can tell when I’m in a good mood, but most can’t pinpoint what I’m feeling when I’m not. When not Happy whatever it may be People always say that I look angry. That part I don’t really mind, because it results in people leaving me alone. wearing this mask all the time I’ve acquired a deep resting bitch face. Given that I also laugh no matter how i’m feeling, I’ve got a few things that make it hard for people to read me.

I believe that this is very skewed. If it was a social norm for men to show emotion I bet all of our relationships including friendships would be easier. Ladies just think how much easier things would be if your crush just told you how he felt about you? Oh wait you’d know exactly how he feels and end up wasting significantly less time. Maybe just maybe it’s about time to stop seeing men as emotionless beings and let them be as emotional as they want without passing judgement.

Write, Edit, Revise, Repeat

This is what I do everyday, and I absolutely love it. Every time I pick up a pad of paper or my laptop I see the progress I’m making towards my goals. Sure I don’t do it for the exact same amount of time every week, but between blogging and actually writing for books I spend between 50-60 hours a week writing. I usually try and take an afternoon off once a week just to get out and possibly find inspiration for a project.

A year ago I never would have guessed that this where i’d be right now. I had been trying to find a career that would help me reach my financial goals and not one that would make me enjoy my job. Kinesiology was great for personal knowledge, but partway through the semester I knew I had no desire for a career in the field. The only course that actually benefited me outside of kines was a leadership class. It may have sucked that it was at 8 am 3 days a week, but the instructor was good at keeping things relatable. so we actually learned the material.

It was actually My English class that reminded me of one of my passions that had been on the back burner for a few years. If I ever go back and get my degree It will definitely be an English literature or a creative writing major. I love words, not even just English words either. I Believe that language is a beautiful thing, how so many words and phrases have multiple meanings. I guess that’s part of why I use writing as my medium to share things with you guys, instead of Paintings… etc. Eventually I’ll have several books published and I don’t think anyone will be judging my career choice as I do What makes me happy.

Cheers,

Addy

Does Procrastination Help or Hinder Creativity

For myself procrastination both helps and hinders my creativity. When I’m unsure about something or don’t want to do something I definitely Procrastinate until the last minute. Some would say that this is a bad thing and it can be, but It also forces me to create better content in a shorter time frame. I think that’s something we are all trying to do each day, at least writers and bloggers that is. In that way procrastination definitely helps creativity. Really I think It depends on who you are and what works for you. some people are really hindered by procrastination while others find motivation in it.

Procrastination can also be a big hinder to my creativity. For example when I’m super bitchy during the last week of every month (What I call My Meriod) I’m literally too moody to be creative so I usually procrastinate a lot during that Time. It causes me to take a break from the light fluffy stuff and focus on things where it’s okay for the reader to catch the bitchy undertone of my writing. once I have a book published anyone that reads my blog will be able to tell what part of the month specific chapters were written. Honestly I think It’ll be kind of funny for anyone that catches on.

Procrastination can go either way, My only advice is don’t procrastinate too much on those post secondary papers. Most people have a lower quality of writing when rushed myself included. The last semester I Took in college was a compressed English course. Working almost full time with a concussion while taking the course was killer. My procrastination skills definitely hindered the quality on the submitted assignments, but life happens. Even not getting the highest grade I could I would still say that out of all the courses I took It was the Most beneficial to me.

My Perfect Writing Setting

I have two Perfect settings for an ideal writing spot they are both very different. the fist one indoor is a neutral pallet room with green-blue accents. It has a large canvas print on one wall. The sunshine beams in through the open curtains making the room all warm and cozy. I’d be sitting in my thrift store bought high back arm chair. I would also probably have headphones in playing one of my writing playlists. if I was trying to set the atmosphere for a specific place I usually burn a candle to try and match the scent.

The second one would be anywhere in nature sitting at a shoreline or against a tree surrounded by just the sounds of nature. I prefer the nature one but, I’m not close to my nature writing spots anymore and the outdoors here aren’t nearly as well kept. watching the occasional animals frolic as they do. I don’t know what it is about nature, but I always feel perfectly centered in nature.whether its the calm sounds or watching beings interacting in such peaceful ways nature works for me.

 My writing playlists are an eclectic mix of rock, pop, edm, alternative, and even some country. If it’s one of those days where i just can’t seem to focus then edm is the only thing that works. Is that normal? are there other writers or bloggers out there that find edm helps for concentration? For example If I have minimal interest for the topic on a paper in college I could only write it listening to Dirty Vegas.I think it’s a little peculiar that both of my perfect settings are on complete opposite sides of the spectrum. My perfect writing spots are why I hope to own a cabin in the middle of nowhere where i can go for days or even weeks on end and write.